I received a download this morning. It’s probably for me, just as much as it is for someone else.
I was told to stop pushing, and be still. My original name, comes from the movie “Roots.” The name means “Be Still.”
All of my life I’ve been PUSHing people away from me, in order to protect myself from whatever further pain I deemed they may cause me.
Meanwhile, I never looked at why I let them in, or ever noticed that maybe they weren’t intentionally TRYING to hurt me.
But what’s important is that my senses said they WOULD hurt me, if I didn’t push them away. Which of course means they would.
Perhaps instead of pushing I should’ve created boundaries, and just LET GO.
Perhaps instead of pushing I should allow those who want to love me, to love me, without caring if I am going to return the love in the manner that they seek.
Perhaps I did give men warnings, that I can be quite charming, and to not fall for me, unless I specifically say I WANT TO BE WITH YOU. But maybe that too was denying them of my soul, and stopped me from embodying The Goddess of Love.
Perhaps I’ve learned a lot, from the people I couldn’t push away. Perhaps those people have shown me the unconditional love I’ve given to many. Perhaps for the first time, I truly see the soul connections I formed. The connections I’m very deserving of.
Perhaps I should not only ALLOW in love, but to allow those who love me to stay around me, and receive their reward of being in my vortex of love. It makes people better people. It makes them warmer, full of hope, smarter and wanting to get closer to source. My presence changes lives.
Perhaps it’s time to change the one word, that helped me manifest my entire grand life.
PUSH – Pray Until Something Happens.
Perhaps it’s time to change that to.
PUSH – Play Until Something Happens.
PLAY because praying is more like waiting for something outside of you in a way, yet it works. But at this new level, I realize all of my best manifestations come from when my heart is at PLAY along with FAITH.
Even in love, it’s like playing a game to me. It’s a game of let’s see how beautiful, magical and full of love we can make this.
Somehow as adults, we’ve taken the word play and made it a negative connotation. It’s a bad word they say. But it’s not.
One of my favorite mentors, has a really simple line that says so much.
“Life is Now, Press Play.” ~ Katrina Ruth
I don’t even need to explain that to you.
In my head, when it comes to the game of life. Cause life is a game. I think a certain way.
In every area of life, Play To Win! ~ Kissy Denise
You must play to win, by going all in. Go all in on every area of life. Half way won’t get you there. Giving up before it manifests won’t get you there. Halfway deciding will never help you BE there.
One of the biggest pieces of advice ever given to me, was by my other favorite mentor Justin Burns.
Justin made me aware of how I tear everything down sometimes, without going all in. He taught me how to work with what I have, and to keep making it better.
Perhaps I let fear cause me to push things away, or maybe it’s my impatience.
But the clear thing is, when you go all in, you figure out a way to make it work. There is no turning back. It’s a decision to make it work and that it is going to work.
So how do we possibly expect things, businesses, or relationships to work, if we never decide to play to win; by going all in.
If you truly want to win, the biggest rule is to not be average. For average effort will only get you average results. Average decisions will manifest an average, mostly mediocre life.
Going all in, as if there is no other option, cause you will have it no other way, is the only way.
Once you make the decision, the rest is already done for you. There is no need to push or force after that. After that you’re just playing along and going along with the ride. Once you put your tokens in, the game is going to play itself. You’re just there, enjoying the surprises, flowing, moving through and not tripping over the detours.
It doesn’t matter if the path is straight or looped. It’s going to go, where it’s going to go, once you type in the definite destination. But if you never decide the definite destination, then you never know where you’ll end up at. (duh!)
There is a difference between going with the flow, and knowing where the flow is taking you.
When you know where the river is taking you, the journey is supposed to be fun. Remember it’s only a game. There is no need to fear, once you decide to play and go all in.
If you don’t decide these things, you never know where you’ll end up at, but if you’re a called soul things are always going to work out for you in the end, and eventually I suppose you’ll get on your route, cause it’s always SUCCESS and BEING THE BEST. (You made that decision centuries ago.) But if you simply listen to soul, you can avoid lots of pitfalls and just go… With the flow.
I suppose that’s all also part of the game.. The remembering who you are, and what you came to do…
In a way you’re always in the right place at the right time. Things must happen to get you back in alignment, where the experiences aren’t always so painful.
A facebook memory came up today, and I laughed. Then I laughed again. I love God. I love how he works, when I listen…. Other times I want to hit him with my high heel stiletto shoe, from 3 feet away. Or at least I used to before I understood a few things about my lack of listening.
Everything seems like a coincidence. It’s not. When you live in the spiritual realm you one day realize that every moment, every situation, has been guiding you towards something. Learn the lessons.
It’s no coincidence that I now have a book titled “You Can’t Force A Man To Value You.”
I knew the relationship I was in, at the time, was teaching me a lesson about how much I valued myself. I’ve always valued myself immensely, but that relationship taught me that I didn’t value myself enough, at the height of who God called me to be. If other people even valued themselves at the height I did back then, then they would do GREAT at life. I valued myself at Queen level. But I was called to value myself at the GODDESS QUEEN level.. (There are always levels to this sh*t!)
Anyway, I sourced a download for the book title a year ago, during meditation. But I hesitated on writing it. A friend that’s no longer a friend told me not to. As time went on I’ve had to accept that YES, I receive divine downloads and YES, life gets to be easy.
Then a few months ago when I sat down and DECIDED to finally write it, the words simply flowed. Now a year later I’m finally releasing the book. Thank God I write fast! It would’ve taken anyone else a year or more to write a book that was handed to me as a divine gift.
Many people told me not to write my book. Just as many told me that my blog wouldn’t succeed, and to not bother with it. Yet I still made multiple six figures. Cause God told me that I would.
My book is going to do exactly what I know it’s going to do.
People sometimes think you’re just like them… They can’t see. Only the divine can SEE other divine souls. Divine souls told me “Write the book Kissy!”
It’s best that you operate through source. Listen to your intuition. Others don’t understand your journey. Some of us are called to do a specific thing. To fully walk in my calling, God himself had to channel through me and tell me that it was time to wake people up. Otherwise I’m quite sure I’d still be off making 6 figures at something I was tired of, and being with a man who didn’t value me.
But back to my point. When you answer God’s call, you learn the way, on the path. It’s like the Wizard of Oz. You gotta have courage. When you’re on the yellow brick road, a brick will light up. Don’t doubt it. Jump on it. Then the next brick will light up. You don’t necessarily know which brick will light up, but at the end of the day, the road is the road. It’s taking you somewhere. In a way, you know where you’re going. You’ve always known… But you fought it. Jump on the brick and don’t question it. Don’t be bothered that it seems too easy.
What’s REALLY funny, is that the road is going to take you where you’re going, regardless of your decisions. You can’t necessarily make a bad decision. Cause it’ll work out for you in the long-run. Even I suppose if you break something, you’ll learn how to fix it. Which makes you that much more smarter and helpful to mankind.
God told you a long time ago what he wanted you to do. Maybe you didn’t listen. Maybe you didn’t do these things. So you made things harder on yourself than they ever had to be. Cause at the end of the day, when you are called, you are going to do what you are called to do. You must. That’s it, That’s all. You either live in your purpose, or die by the fire of misalignment, disappoint and living a life less than. And for a called soul, less than is basically walking dead. You can barely breathe. So answer the call, and walk through the fire unscorched. If you happen to get scratched by the bricks coming at you, simply command them to be immediately healed. If you fall, then you’d better get your booty back up again.
But at no point should you ever stop moving, give up, or pretend that you don’t know you’re being called. No point of fighting it.
If you need help getting into alignment and answering the call of your soul, and desire to work with me 1 on 1 to help you manifest your true hearts desire in business or love, message me.
I don’t know if this blog is for me or other people… I’m just writing in flow.
Last week I had the most wonderful vacation. Mexico was nice, but Miami is sometimes like my perfect flow that can be reached in under 6 hours. Anywhere else requires a 20 hour flight. MIA is a reminder of where I come from with a reminder of where I’m going. The environment is a perfect mix for me. Miami is a place that reminds me of Dream Life. The ocean, with clear blue water is something I imagined as a child living in the projects. For kids like me, something as simple as that was a fantasy. Many people I grew up with probably never left the city before. I didn’t get on an airplane for the first time until after I’d turned 21. I didn’t grow up with the luxuries and norms other people had. It was also nice to be treated like a Queen. Being around men who make sh*t happen is therapeutic for me. I find it amazing that I attract so many men who are willing to happily cater to me, yet other women simply settle for a men who don’t adore them. I’m much happier around men who appreciate my presence and honor me.
After my trip I was also forced to come to clarity about people and my direction in life. My friend reminded me that maybe I’d been playing it a little too safe, and that you’ll never get what you want by playing it safe. Many of us try to play it safe, even in love. People move slow, the put up walls, all as a way to protect their heart and avoid pain. It doesn’t work. Love is always a risk. Even more that’s what flow is all about. Learning to be in alignment and go with the flow. You see safety is also a way your fears keep you small. It keeps you from playing big. Safety gives you predictable results. But all of the fun and the shift is in the unpredictable.
That’s how God works. He may give you a huge vision like he’s given to many. But that doesn’t mean he’s going to tell you the whole, entire plan. The plan reveals itself as you walk. Some things are going to happen that will absolutely shock you in a good way. The unpredictable is how God surprises you.
Like this morning. I woke up to a HUGE shift. I can already see miracles playing out in my life. I’m so excited I could jump up and down on the bed. It’s the same thing that happens to my clients after my infamous 1 Hour Soul Alignment, Rapid Transformation session.
These shifts are available for everyone, but it also takes being able to download source codes from the Universe. I’m pretty good for downloading codes for myself and my clients. However healers like me are simply a shortcut.
Here are a few tips to bring miraculous alignment shifts into your life, on your own.
Live in your truth of what you want. Never deny the desires of your soul. You want what you want for a reason.
Don’t play is safe. Safety is for suckers. Jumping out of airplanes and cliffs is for the brave and the bold. You gotta listen to your heart, go all in and see where it leads you. Besides that’s how this works. You gotta walk by FAITH.
Don’t waste time being upset. Always return to your happy place as fast as possible.
Everything is temporary, nothing is permanent. If you are going through something always remember that this too shall pass. For every problem there is a solution. Stick to God and the solution will come.
I haven’t blogged in about a week, even though I have a lot to talk about. Sometimes I feel like I’m just rambling and maybe people don’t actually need to hear the things I have to say. But that’s just me being in my head. Which is why you can’t always live in your head. Your mission is here on earth.
Anyway, the past 2 weeks have caused a great shift in my life. I’ve gained mass clarity and things about people in my life have been revealed to me. I see things with such clarity, and realize it is my heart that often blocks me from seeing people as they are, as they are truly presenting themselves to me.
For my male friends I realize I’ve had way too much mercy on the men in my life. Mostly because I’m a boss chick and love to do my own thing. I’ve had men do lots for me, but me not wanting to ever be a burden to anyone or cause anyone to give me more than what they have or more than they want to give, is sort of, kind of, a receiving problem.
You see when you are determined to see and perceive things one way, it’s stops you from receiving information with clairvoyance. The same sentence can be said to 5 different people and 5 different people may view the sentence differently. People view what is said based upon their own thoughts and beliefs.
Especially if something isn’t said with definite certainty. In the past a person could say something to me, and my mind usually goes 3 layers deep to try to empathize with and understand that person.
I often look at people as being deeper than they are. Then they’ll remind me that whatever they said wasn’t that deep. And it’s like “Oh, it’s not? Okay.” Then I have to come back up three layers to say “Okay. It is what it is.”
Then I look at the cards that are laid out on the table exactly as they are, and not as I would like them to. Then I have to tell my mind, that I have to play them properly. I have to operate logic over emotions.
As an intuitive person and an empath, I often live in my head. In my head people generally tend to be good people, and there is always a good reason for why they do the things they do. I constantly put myself in other people’s shoes. Which is good for my clients. But not so good for the opposite sex.
I literally have been adjusting my beliefs about people, in order to see them as perfect. Meanwhile other people can see they are not perfect just as plain as day. Sometimes I give people too much love, to which they are not due. Everyone deserves to be loved, but every man definitely does not deserve the level of love to which I am known to deliver.
When they are not deserving of it, I have noticed that my spirit will somehow pop the truth right in front of my face, when I’m not even looking for it. I could say the revelation comes as a total shock, but it doesn’t. Cause there were always those doubts, that were not being drowned out by them, but instead by me. The doubts were drowned out by my own empathetic traits.
Therefore people have had to work 10 times less in order to prove themselves, because I do all of the work for them, inside my mind.
Then in the end, when my spirit guides finally awaken me to the person, I realize I’ve been seeing them as perfect, whole and complete, and like a human, meanwhile they really can’t see me, and perceive me to be a lot less than I AM.
Now I went this long way of explaining this to you, so that you’ll understand exactly how other people’s behavior and the way people treat you, are only a reflection of the way you treat yourself.
My own good heart, once stopped me from treating myself at the level that I AM at. If that makes any sense. I’ve in many ways allowed society to rock me to sleep and humble myself in ways I should not.
If you say you’re something. You gotta be that something. Because if you be any less than that, people are going to treat you as less than that.
What caused this behavior was my awakening. I tried to be better than I once was. I became nicer. Nicer is good. But my boundaries were not high enough. Us good-hearted souls must institute sky high boundaries, not just for others, but to protect ourselves from ourselves. If we don’t, we will only make excuses for people’s behavior towards us.
Us empaths are good for over empathizing and fixing situations in our head. Like I said, we don’t even make people work to prove themselves to us. We are quick to open up, quick to share, quick to give love, and quick to see people at their best and highest good.
Our hearts and minds live in the 5D realm. We forget that we are here on earth in the 3D realm. Even others who operate in 4D, and their vision is still not at a full 100% like ours is. Most are still trying to find their way in the dark. Meanwhile we already see the path lit up and are walking it.
So what I have to do now, is teach myself to stop putting other people’s wants and desires first. I have to put my own wants and desires first. What do I want? How do I want this to go? How do I want to be treated? How do I expect to be treated? I literally have to train myself to deeply make things about me, and stop always considering the whole round and spectrum of what other people want. I have to teach myself a little selfishness. Not too much, because balance is good, and I still want to maintain my good heart and ensuring every transaction is beneficial to all parties involved.
When it comes to me, I’m the celebrity party. I’m the person who will rise to the top. I’m also the perfect with the brilliant mind and the beautiful spirit that stays connected to source. It benefits people greatly to be able to mention that they know me. It benefits people to simply bask in my presence. It makes them happy. It benefits people greatly if I allow them into my life, because I am connected to source, and a brilliant vortex of love. Therefore I’m going to daily send them warm vibes of love, wish prosperity on people and see them at their highest self, which blesses them with excelled success. I am gifted and anointed. I am a Prophetess and a chosen one.
Now, I just said all of that, and what does something in my system want to do? Deny it, tell myself I’m not really all of those things. Tell myself to calm down, to hold back and that maybe those things are not true. But this time I can’t do that. WHY?
Because:
1. I now know the cost of lying to myself and trying to humble myself. I know that trying to be less or be beneath people so that they will feel better about themselves, does indeed make people feel better about themselves, so I’m walking in my purpose. BUT, however, it causes people to be asleep as to who I AM. They are only going by what I show them. They don’t have the vision of clairvoyance or prophecy like I do. They are not me.
2. I was forced to look back at my track record and see how people benefit from being in my life. I change lives of all whom I bring into my circle. I inspire people who have never even met me. My words inspire them.
So the lessons here are:
Believe who people tell you they are the first time.
Understand that even though you may value yourself, God may want you to value yourself even more than you do. You can not do your mission if you don’t understand your inherent value and act accordingly.
If you’re a woman I have found that either a man goes hard for you, or you don’t give him your love and companionship. That’s it. That’s all. When a man wants a woman he’s going to go hard. Anything else is just him feeling confused, cause you’re not necessarily the one. When he finds the one he moves on it. When he’s not, he stalls. Another man may want you, but when he’s not gifting you by actually going out to buy you gifts, chances are, he’s not that into you. Men who are really into a woman think about her when he’s out and about and throughout the day. Not just at night…
Phuck humbling yourself. It’s a losing game. I’ve noticed that some people are so full of themselves, yet they aren’t even all of that. But they will think they are all of that if your royal highness allows herself to be around them. Some people are clout chasers. Such people rarely ever can see the depth of people. Because they don’t function at a soul level.
More about humility… When I was around people who couldn’t see me for who I truly am. I thought it to be no big deal. NOPE! That’s a clear sign that they are not your tribe. But because you can see them, you may dismiss it. If they can’t see you too, they are not for you. People who can’t see you, help you to go longer without seeing your highest self. People who can see you, speak life and love into you. They pull you up and tell you to go further. They propel you. They give you clarity on what’s going on in your life and the people around you. They actually want the best for you, so therefore they can see things in a way that is best for you. When people don’t operate from their hearts towards you, they can’t truly feed into you.
Be honest with yourself about how amazing you are. It is what it is.
When you feel some kind of way about a person, and you keep trying to dismiss it, you’ll later be told why you had that feeling. Take heed to “feeling” some kind of way about people. Don’t always have a need to correct your feeling to make it feel better or correct. Sometimes it is what it is. If you feel gross about a person, it’s because they are. Simple as that. Don’t wait on more evidence to back it up.
So I guess I just had my awakening from my awakening. 🤷🏼♀️
This week as I’m finally done with the last edits of my new book “You Can’t Force A Man To Value You – Becoming A High Value Woman & Attracting The Man Of Your Dreams” I finally feel that I can now give myself permission to move forward and stop living my past storyline. I feel like I can take up space again, and be present.
I think back to last year around this time the title popped in my head. I showed a friend at the time (we’re no longer friends) the quick cover that I’d made for the book. She immediately told me that it was a terrible title and that I shouldn’t be working on a book. She told me that I should instead work on my new life coaching business.
Meanwhile one of my preacher friends kept insisting that I write a book. I opted to work on my life coaching business. I got REALLY good at helping people. I even zoomed in on my tribe and received amazing reviews. I mastered sales and got really good at closing high ticket sales over messenger and on calls. I accomplished A LOT. I healed many of my money beliefs and self-worth issues. But still things weren’t right. Still I had myself held up in my own cave, healing, studying, learning, giving love, but not being open to receiving love. I got into this obsessive work pattern.
I was totally overthinking things. I should’ve wrote the book a long time ago. The truth is, I never had to do all of the work that I was doing. It never had to be so hard. All I ever had to do was write. But my first life coach told me to leave blogging alone. She said I was better off focusing on my other gifts. Even with me having 500,000 followers from BLOGGING, she didn’t realize that my greatest gift is writing. Another coach after her, pointed my writing gift out to me. You see when people initially encounter me, they believe people follow me because I’m attractive. It takes them a while to take note that my writing is powerful. Sometimes I go back and read my own blogs and even I catch a shift. I didn’t realize writing was my gift, cause it’s something that I just do. It barely takes me any thought. It simply flows…. Meanwhile there I was trying to figure out how to get in the flow. 🤣 The things that happen to us, when we start looking outside of ourselves. But I’m not mad at myself. These are all things that I had to learn on the path.
Ever since I quit my blog I had a hard time making decisions. Always in my head. Too afraid to choose wrong. Doubting myself and so many other things. Today I finally decided no more of that. I’ll live life in the moment, do as I please, enjoy myself, and know that the Universe will work it to my best interest.
You see when you first start a new online business NO, it’s probably not going to take off fast the way you want it to. Even when you’re someone like me who is simply used to winning. But what you must understand is that even though it may not take off fast, doesn’t mean you’re doing something wrong. It doesn’t mean that it’s time to doubt yourself. Success is a process. And the Universe is definitely part of the process. The first part is throwing bones at you, to see how badly you really want it. It’s sooo easy to cave into the bones or take it as a sign that it’s not meant for you. But you shouldn’t, despite what the people around you may say.
What you should do is either throw the bones back at the Universe or sweep them in a corner to be ignored.
Like French Montana says ‘Don’t Panic,’ just keep going. Sh*t has to work out when you’re a called soul. There is no other option. You may as well laugh at yourself for thinking there was.
Real spiritual awakening is so life changing, that I think very few “professionals” tend to explain with it with great clarity. It’s definitely not all light and love. It’s pain and frustration mixed with glory before the fun begins.
kissy denise
The Masterpiece / The Goddess of Love & Motivation
Going woo woo and grounding myself into the spiritual realm is one of the hardest things I’ve ever done in my life. I used to have a very hard time understanding it’s real, although I obviously manifest with the best of them.
The person that truly helped me get through and learn spiritual principles that help me in every part of life is Makhosi Candiss. She is a Shamaness, but not the dark kind you’re used to hearing about. She’s a light, a great mirror of me, beautiful, self-less, brilliant, heart-centered and loves to see people doing well. But her best gift is her understanding of spirituality. She’s like a spiritual computer that understands every level of spiritual awakening. Also like me she is a Dream Life Activator. We both help people find their purpose and manifest like magic.
Candiss is having an upcoming webinar “The Shamanic Secrets To Find Your Purpose & Manifest Like Magic,” where she will explain the process of purpose, magic and manifestation the shamanic way. At the end of the webinar her cart will be open for three days to join her course. I want everyone to learn these secret principles that she’s knows because they’ve helped me greatly.
I especially recommend you sign up for her free webinar if you’re:
a spiritual seeker who struggles to find your purpose
You’ve already experienced success but feel there’s a nagging void that says there’s something bigger for you.
You’ve spent countless hours doing self-help work, watching videos, reading books and still can’t figure out how to use that information to transform your life.
You’re tired of the same day, week and month, day after day, year after year and are ready to get off the hamster wheel.
during the free webinar you will learn:
mistakes
The most common mistakes people make on their spiritual journey and how to avoid them.
PEACE
How to create a supportive environment to bring peace to your sacred journey.
Purpose
The proven system you’ve been missing that will lead you to your divine purpose and manifest your soul’s desires.
CLARITY
Get clear on your soul ascension path to identify what stage of life you’re in.
In partnership, I am offering a few bonuses to work with me for those who buy into her course during open cart.
1. An autographed copy of my new book “You Can’t Force A Man To Value You – Becoming A High Value Woman & Attracting The Man Of Your Dreams.”
Value$475
2. My Masterclass on Using Social Media To Manifest A SoulMate. Use your laptop to attract your soulmate family.
value$2997
3. Free Entry into my course ‘Confidence Unleashed, By Kissy Denise” Magically transform your confidence to get what you want from life.
Value$555
Enlightenment is not just one state
To get these freebies you must say on the form that you were referred by Kissy Denise.
Sometimes I wonder if I live in my own little world. Women talk about toxic masculinity, and in my head I’m like “Yeah. I remember having such relationships BEFORE I awakened.”
But once I awakened and healing set in, I immediately started to attract Kings. Even online I meet the most amazing men who straight up do for me. Even when I wasn’t healed I attracted a man online who flew me to Belize on our 2nd date. I generally attract amazing men. Even the bad ones I picked were amazing. I went out a date recently and it was amazing watching the brilliance of that man. Like literally, all I know are amazing men. That seems normal to me at this point.
I’ve been slow to offer too many courses because I really wanted to get into the mindset of people and understand them. I’m all about real transformation. I give all of my clients immediate transformation within an hour of buying into my 1 on 1 consulting. Doesn’t matter if were talking business, branding, confidence or relationships.
I bought a few small courses and overall what I’ve learned is that not many people can really teach you HOW to really transform. You gotta have real power to be able to transform souls. Even my book that’s about to come out is going to change the lives of millions of women and stop their dating patterns.
I’m working on my Goddess course right now, and even that, I realize that people may sell you a course saying they’ll teach you HOW to be a Goddess, but if you check the dictionary the person teaching doesn’t measure up.
It takes a great person to truly teach you how to be great. It takes a person who has jumped leaps and bounds to teach you how to truly heal and walk into the highest version of yourself.
It’s really important that you figure out what you are truly good at, because those people need you to show up. Otherwise they buy into other people who have no idea what they are talking about.
IF you buy into a Goddess course that means you need to start being magnetic AF and attracting both men and women like Kissy. Cause that’s the results my clients get.
I see so many people selling courses and coaching. But I check their reviews and it’s nothing… Check their fanpage and it’s crickets. REALLY good coaches have at least 3 raving fans.
I see people using mumbo jumbo words that no one outside the circle understands. I don’t speak their way. I speak it my way. Instead of telling you a whole paragraph of words that take you around the bush and further confuse you, I simply come with the truth, so people can get their life back.
I realize people are humans, playing out these storylines, wasting their time. When God told me to wake people up, I truly understand now. My understanding now of why I must show up and why people need me is deeper than it was a week ago.
I hate to see people suffering inside these storylines.
A client tagged me in a post today thanking me for speaking life into her. In the post she says that I can’t even understand just how much I’ve helped her. She says that often. A lot of my clients say that. And they are right. In many ways I’m still just Kissy running around helping people, except now I get paid for it and appreciated. But I’m simply doing what God called me to do. I’m in my purpose. It still hasn’t hit me as to the depth of what I do in people’s life.
Anyway this particular client is awakening. I was reading her post where she was discussing the array of feelings she’s experiencing.
““dying to self”, letting go of certain habits, certain people & lifestyles, is NO joke! it’s hard. it hurts. you’ll be angry, mad, sad, won’t understand some things, you’ll cry lots of tears, and feel a million emotions. I mourn the girl I used to be bc she’s “familiar”, and even the woman I am now bc she’s “comfortable”, but great things never happen in your comfort zone. stepping into the unknown is scary, but you better believe- ima do it scared!”
I thought back to my own awakening and how painful it was. You know what makes some awakenings so painful? It’s because it happens when you finally get to the point where you feel you can deal with life. You’re about to finally stop fighting against the things you can not change, accept that maybe you’ll never be a multi-millionaire, but at least you can buy a million dollar home, continue to make multi-six figures, and be with whatever mate you’re with, even though they really aren’t measuring up to the greatness you seek.
Other people are happily married to a great mate, but they are sick and tired of their job, but they try to accept it. They actually work to get comfortable with it, cause it pays the bills, and still they are making 6 figures so they are doing more than average.
The awakening seems to come when you start to practice mass gratitude. You’re not trying to complain at all. You try with all of your might to be grateful for whatever God has given you. Then BOOM! All hell breaks loose. The awakening hits you. First you’re all excited, like “How Cool!” You suddenly become sensitive to negativity. You can’t take it. Then things start going crazy, and usually you can get a hold on things pretty fast and stop it, but not this. It’s like the more you fight to keep it together, the worst things get. Then you’re like “Damn. Does God suddenly hate me or something? I thought we were cool. I mean before this he gave me everything I asked for.”
Then if you are spiritual you eventually realize that God has a plan for you, and you’re going to have to sit down and ride the storm out.
For some that storm will make you want to commit suicide, cause life just ain’t the same and you get tired of having gratitude for mere crumbs.
Then you start noticing things about yourself and your thoughts. Then it goes “OMG. I’m not perfect. I need to change some things about myself.”
I think the most painful part is that we rush to change things about ourselves instead of just accepting that God has now changed our heart, and know that he’ll do the rest.
Things tend to get easier after that. Except for spiritual life coaches. I don’t even feel like talking about the chaos that comes upon you when you go from spiritual awakening into hopping into become a life coach. That’s pretty much like walking yourself through the valley of the shadow of death, plus the valley of fire, and a few more trenches. The pain of the transformation is insane. But when you finally butterfly, you cry. It’s so beautiful. The reward you get for holding onto your faith when the ship was out to sea being torn to shreds by the storm. The storm finally subsides. Peace that surpasses all understanding is back again. Except this time you’re in a whole new realm, world and dimension. Sometimes you wonder if it’s real. Life gets to be just that good.
P.S. Spiritual awakening is actually easy for many. That’s not my experience or those that I work with, so I can’t speak on that. My awakening was the dark night of the soul experience. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
Basically the faster you stop giving af about material stuff, marriage, the house, the kids and the happily ever after, the faster you can lose the illusion, shift your consciousness, then get back to dream life the right way. (Still getting everything you ever wanted)
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