I scanned “Surviving R. Kelly,” despite not really wanting to watching it, but being curious of course. As we did grow up listening to the Pied Piper sing.
Before I watched the show I decided to enter the vortex and watch from third person. Therefore what I saw had no affect on me. No judgement. Only truths.
What stood out most for me was Andrea Kelly.
There was a time when I too was sitting in a house allowing a man to hit me, hurt me, physically abuse me, verbally abuse me, and not appreciate me for the beautiful, amazing, light filled woman that I am. The woman who literally showed him how to create a 6 Figure business.
I was told by him that I was ‘Stupid,’ I knew…. nothing about me was stupid.
Nothing except being with him. Because I must always tell myself my truths, I could no longer allow myself to be with such a man. The costs and the losses no longer mattered. I prayed to God to relieve me of just a little bit of the love I had for him. Just enough to give me the strength to release myself and walk away from him.
I did that. My life after that seemed like it fell apart. I bounced around homeless for a while and rather destitute.
I cried for about 6 months straight. My abuser was also my best friend. I felt like I’d lost 2 great things at once. The emotional pain was severe. I fought and I fought month after month to get through it. I was intent on healing myself. I knew there was no point of my tears. After all the people who break your heart and abuse you don’t care. It’s part of who they are.
Crying over them is a waste of your time. They happily move on to the next victim. Which why must take self-accountability for staying and allowing yourself to be mistreated.
After leaving my abusive situation, I created a 6 Figure blog that impacted the life of others. My followers had no idea what I’d been through, because I don’t do the victim thing. I’m a warrior and a survivor of other people’s b.s. behavior. But had I stayed in an abusive relationship, that blog never would’ve happened. You are literally doing yourself and the world a disservice by allowing yourself to be used and abused.
Now that you know my background, my thoughts on Andrea.
It’s obvious she’s still reeling and going through the pain and the anger. However she takes no self-accountability for staying. For allowing her children to witness the madness.
But I understand, when finances are involved you continue to allow the abuse, instead of believing that God will take care of you. Often you make decisions that you feel are in the best interest and preservation of your children’s happiness. You do the best you can at the time.
I didn’t know God super well at the time of my abusive situation, but I knew him to be real and prayed to him. I did go homeless after that, but still I left. Money was not my God. I would no longer allow it to hold me hostage.
While painful, in order to heal, one must accept the FACT that they stayed and allowed the abuse to continue.
Many women say their earned their husband’s last name and they’re not changing it. That’s understandable.
However, how do you hate a person so badly and still continue to carry their last name, and say you earned it? That shows lack of identity in who you are. If you don’t want to go back to your old name, that’s understandable, but heal and find a new husband. Carrying the name of your abuser is a constant reminder of the pain.
There are thousands of men and women who are going through an abusive situation at this very moment, or trying to heal from one, after walking away.
Heartbreak messes with your finances. During this time it’s best to be around a group of people who understand what you’re going through, and they too are fighting to heal and form a new life, just like you.
I’m launching a new group course called Heartbreak to 6 Figures for broken souls who are ready to do the work it takes to heal and build a purposeful business that helps others.
The program does require a financial investment in yourself. It’s going to change your life, break chains, and stop the cycle of abuse and lack of self-love in your life.
This program is not for you, if you don’t believe you can make 6 Figures. It’s not for you if you have an excuse as to why you aren’t willing to invest money into something that’s going to change your life and the life of your kids, along with future generations.
It’s also not for you, if you don’t really feel it in your soul, that it’s time to make a change, and that God is calling you to do more.
This program is for superstars who are ready to dust themselves off and try again.