KISSYDENISE.COM

Stop Feeling Sorry For Black Men. It’s Robbing You Of Your Beauty & Youth, and It’s Holding Him Back

by | Love & Relationships

You have to stop feeling sorry for black men. They know the way to go. They just choose not to.
 
1. They chose to have women providing for them.
2. They chose to not want to pay bills but access a woman’s energy.
3. They know they need positive energy, but have no value for a feminine woman’s energy.
 
Many believe that someone owes them something. That someone has to do something for them. They are usually looking for a woman to do things for them, that their mother didn’t do for them. They carry loads of trauma, while believing themselves to be good men.
 
I’ve heard many black men online say that men don’t value beautiful women; while chasing after beautiful women of whom they can’t truly afford.
 
All these wounded men have this thing going on in their heads, they have a WOE is me storyline or something.
 
Any man who comes around you, and constantly accesses your positive energy without paying you, is robbing you of your energy and your youth.  A healed masculine man wouldn’t even do such a thing. He knows he’s playing with his own abundance. 
 
Money is ENERGY.
 
You must judge a man on how much he’s feeding into you, on top of his character and his WISDOM.
 
Wise men seek to get married. They often just don’t know how to find their soulmate and try to do it on their own.

Britain’s Prince Harry poses with Meghan Markle in the Sunken Garden of Kensington Palace, London, Britain, November 27, 2017. REUTERS/Toby Melville

 
It’s not YOU that you have to change. You have to change your mindset on your opinions of the men and the people you let into your life.
 
A man will literally buy a $1600 pair of shoes, and go have sex with a woman for free. She thinks she’s high value because she’s free.
 
He thinks she’s of very little value because it took much of nothing to get her.

When you give black men money, help them get on their feet, or to allow them to live with you without paying all of the bills, his mind begins to seek out ways that he can TAKE more from you.   He may even give a little, so that he has more room to TAKE from you.  They will take advantage of your trust.

Quite often we want to sugarcoat this and pretend like it’s not happening. Because we want black men to be good.  But it’s ludicrous to label every black man as “good.”

We want to because we often know what they are up against. They are up against a lot. They are up against oppression and even need to fear harm from other black men.   And they ultimately take all of that stress out on whatever black woman will allow them around while operating in a low capacity.
 
The men and their 3D mindset is the reason many don’t have wealth nor do they know how to get wealth. Their eyes are focused on someone else’s wealth and believing themselves to be limited. 
 
Which also means there is a disconnect from God and the heart.
 
Men connected to God want:
1. A woman he loves.
2. A woman whom he can provide for.
 
But most aren’t going to find love, because most don’t even show up as a provider. Right away they throw off the masculine and feminine balance. And women who don’t only allow in provider men, throw off the energetic balance also. This is why women are mostly blamed when the relationship goes sour. 

Jada Pinkett Will Smith

If he’s driving your car while you’re at work, picking up other women, you are at fault for dealing with a man who didn’t have his sh*t together.  Sis, sympathy, compassion and kindness gets you NO WHERE when you’re dealing with men who aren’t handing you money and feeding life and love into you.

You don’t get bonus points for feeding the snakes.  A man is a slithering snake ready to bite, until he becomes a man of class, stature and value.  See a snake slithers around, often being sneaky. A human MAN, stands up and gets what he wants by verbal command and consistent action backed with good intent.  And we’re not talk about the so called good intent men who stay doing a woman wrong. His brain is all off, thinking harming you is of benefit to you because he supposedly had good intent. Such men have an immature mindset.

See some men are okay with taking from women, because he sees himself as lowly. In his own eyes, he believes he sees himself as high and mighty. But he doesn’t. Because if he did, he would get up and be a King who provides.

Therefore a man who is inadequate in his ability to provide for you is a danger to you.  Remember that many single women take care of kids and multiple men at the same time. THE STRENGTH.  It comes from dealing with one too many men who didn’t feel it was their God given ability to provide. 

So many black men are looking for the maid. They want live in maids.  Their entire value system of a woman is based upon domestic duties, without notice of his own ability or inability to provide STAFF for domesticated duties, and be able to simply enjoy his woman’s femininity.

Such a man’s mind is ran by a LACK mindset. And because of it, his mind thinks of ways to TAKE from a woman to make up for what he feel he doesn’t have.

There is a lot of dysfunction that goes on with many men.  Single parent households and self-worth issues play out loudly on the screen.

You must change your movie script by only being turned on or interested in men who are capable of PROVIDING for you right now.

Another truth is you have a better chance of getting a provider man when you are already bossed up and providing for yourself. But what most women do when they are bossed up is go get a man who can’t provide, instead of being patient and doing the work to manifest dream man.

WHY? Because of the scarcity, that society and all the people disconnected from God have put out into the atmosphere.  You fear you’re running out of time. You fear you won’t be accepted for your perceived flaws.  They whisper the words “You Can’t” in your ear.  It’s all lies. RISE and Unleash Your Inner Goddess who feels she deserves to be valued.

Judge men based upon how much money he’s investing in you, and his character when it comes to the way he treats women and his value system.
 
I was listening to a client the other day tell me how a coach was telling women who were average that they didn’t deserve an above average man.
 
He obviously only knows a small portion of life. Because what most successful, good-hearted men, who follow God and actually pay bills do, is get an average woman, because her requirements are low.
 
Only later does he realize that her low requirements aren’t a match for his high ambition.
 
Meanwhile there is a man telling women that they can’t have, exactly what many women are having.
 
Some will tell you that you can’t get a good man to provide for you when you have a couple of kids. Not true either.
 
But back to this one guy. He also said that women needed to stop looking for men who were over 6 Feet, because most men are shorter.
 
It’s the same old tired storyline. But it’s not these men’s faults. It’s the women’s fault for listening.
 
See women judge women if they don’t have a man. But a man can hop online and give out relationship advice without having a wife, without obviously having any value for actual high value women, nor without knowing the abundance of God.
 
Now as to what you can’t have. Every day a client is calling me telling me how she just attracted her dream man.
 
Anything is possible when people operate with their heart.
 
And women can freely operate with their heart when you set boundaries and BE the high value woman that GOOD MEN actually like.
 
If not, you set yourself up to be drained by men who don’t know the value of women.
 
Don’t view it as money. It’s not about the money. It’s the meaning behind the money. The meaning is, “I am consistently investing in you because I appreciate your energy and want to keep you in my life.”
 
One of my male friends said that to me the other day. He sent me $2,500. Not because I asked him to. Not because I needed money. He was the last man that I was expecting money to come from.
 
But here is the thing, he has great character. He values women. He didn’t even send me that money hoping to have sex with me. I haven’t seen in years.
 
You can have so many men loving on you and investing in you, or you can feel low value and deal with men who don’t invest in you, and will drain you.
It’s best to stop dealing with low vibe men and pretending you have a good man, knowing damn well he’s breaking your heart with his behavior. You know in your heart that you want to be treated like a Queen. Yet, you don’t want to cause black men any man, so instead you stand there taking the pain he dishes out to you. Instead you have opted to be a martyr. Stop it!  It’s not about race at all. It’s about your HEART, your JOY, and what YOU deserve.  Put yourself first. It’s the only way you’ll find a man who will put you first.

Besides that, feeling sorry for a black man or taking it easy on him, denies him of his own capabilities. Which means he will then look at you as a person who LACKS.  You lower your own value by dealing with a man who isn’t providing for you. Not to mention he is going to resent the phuck out of you for looking at him as a charity/sympathy case.

When you meet a man who you like and would love to be with, although he isn’t providing for you, check yourself, before you wreck yourself.  Tell him “Hey King. I think you are amazing. But I see you are at a place right now where you don’t feel that I am the woman of your dreams that you want to provide for right now. So I won’t be the woman who will handicap you. I believe in you.”

Send him on his way. He’ll use up another woman’s energy, and then come back to you money in hand ready to marry you and provide a great life for you.

Look at black men as capable Kings. He is more than capable of being wealthy and providing for you. If he doesn’t, you’re simply not the woman of his dreams.  The woman of his dreams would inspire him just that much.
Accepting any man who doesn’t look at you as the woman he’s going out into the world and provides for, is essentially holding him back.   You handicap a man when you don’t believe in his ability to provide for you RIGHT NOW. You think you’re doing a good thing, but chances are, it will backfire. It has with way too many women. The odds of such a man appreciating you are low.

Don’t feel sorry for anyone. Not even yourself.

 
Men who provide, feed LIFE into you. They make you have more faith in God’s ability to provide for you. Because a man is a vessel of God’s loving support.
 
Want to attract more divine, abundant men who are successful, smart, gifted, charming and are ready to get married and know the value of an amazing woman?
 
Click Here To: Become A High Value Woman In Order To Attract Your Dream Man
UPDATE:  I received a phenomenal response to this blog post by one of my male followers. 
Monty M Powell wrote: “Of course these black women are natural “mothers”! The slave mother would even suckle a white baby with her own milk before her own! Genetically modified for mothering up until this day!
Thank the nature of the universal way that my mother and grandmother showed me early that they didn’t owe me sh*t!

I’ve watched black single mothers soft as hell on their rotten disrespectful piece of sh*t sons! Raising a new generation of brothers who can’t even change a flat tire! When the warriors of any nation stop being warriors they tend to suckle their birth mother well beyond puberty! In the past 30 years this has been the common practice of the black woman with her male child and grandchild! They’re not teaching them sh*t and don’t care who knows it!
Dude gets locked up? I’ve seen a chick sell her food stamps to put money on his books! N***ah get outta jail cursing her out and being totally disrespectful!

The black males are learning how to bite the hands that feed them and the fathers of these miscreants have since lost control and respect! How can most of these “women” NOT feel sorry for some wayward bastard who doesn’t have the common sense enough to treat his own mother and grandmother with respect?

Then there’s the “GO-ON GIRL!” I don’t need no broke A$$ N***ah squad who secretly will nurse a street rat back to non-needy status only to have him burn the sh*t outta her and get a white chick after all has been said and done! Black chick of 2019 and 2020 are still playing the pick up woman and the aunt Jermima mammie type chick!
I’ve met a few of these coming through! Not every black man needs a hand out but a hand up in the form of living trust and loyal belief in a brother! Some of us know how to handle a real woman but we get confused while dealing with an immature slave mentality mammie! The same way black men forget their lane is the same way black women forget theirs! What makes us different from whites is the whites remind their men and women and many times they listen to each other while we don’t! Head strong becomes stuck on stupid from both sexes and in all ages in the black communities!

The title of Mother Earth belongs to the black woman! Whether she wants to own it or not! It’s clear many choose NOT to own it at all! Thanks to the times and social media. Many are choosing to not own sh*t while wanting the crown of Queen! Heavy is the head that bares the crown!!

Takes a hell of a lot more than jive hoe quotes and misguided bullsh*t bible verses to raise a nation of thinkers doers and educators!”
love
marriage
wealth
marriage