Let it burn and stop romanticizing the wrong man

by | Love & Relationships

The game of Monopoly is an all-time favorite game. Especially when you throw away the rules and play it your way. Like when you decide that free space is where all of the fines and money will go. Then you appear to get lucky and land on that space and to the dismay of the others players you collect all of the money sitting under that space. How cool right?  

But what about when you become enlightened and you learn that you gotta start throwing sh*t away and eliminating things in order to make space for something new. Yet when it comes to making space for your King, you seem all too willing to let a Prince sit in that position. Blocking the King from taking the throne of your heart….

Some of our relationships fall apart, before they even start. It starts by that man pursing you, but not thinking that you are one of the most beautiful women in the world.” ~ Kissy Denise

When he doesn’t see you this way, his mind can’t separate you from other women and notify him to put in work like he never has before. There is no signal that notifies his mind and soul that this is the woman he wants, and that he has to have her. He does not enforce the 10x Rule, nor does he go hard, like Grant Cardone.

Yet by all means on every accord other than him not seeing you as the woman of his dreams, he’s perfect for you, or at least he could be.

I mean no one is perfect. You gotta work with people right. You gotta stand there, be consistent, forego your emotional needs and see the divine in him. So that you can have a relationship with a healthy man. But the lack of connection bores the phuck out of you.  But it’s all you, it’s a reflection of you, go within, learn the lessons,  what am I supposed to learn here you say? You keep trying, you keep romanticizing him, and ‘feeling‘ in the blanks that he’s not filling. You’re doing all of the work for him, in your head and heart.  On the other end your subconscious is saying “Let go Sis. He’s not the one for you. He’s not putting in the work.”  But you’re like “Nope, I’m going to stand here and continue to see the divine in him. I want to see how this will work out. I THINK this will work out.” You do it for a little while. Then you’re back to bored again with him.  Your enlightened friend tells you to keep at it.  You go back again.  But you hear your soul screaming at you saying “No Sis. ” Deep down inside, you know you need to let it go. You gotta let it burn.  You even find the courage to. You let go.  But then it’s like “What if?” What if I would’ve just hung in there, fell in line and went with HIS plan. 

Now here is where I’m about to reveal your mind to you, and remind you of the red flag that you see plain as day, but continue to ignore, in the name of light and love.

 This whole time he’s been telling you that you’re asking for too much. He has verbally told you “I can’t do that. That ain’t me.”  Your empathy and understanding kicks in. You get him. You understand him. You even get why it all makes sense to him. 

You’re repeating a pattern. Your whole life people have been telling you that you’re asking for too much and expecting too much…

Once again, you’re forgetting about yourself, failing to put you first, forgetting your hopes and your dreams. 

You feel like this will work out, let me fall in line with his plan. Then what happens? He falls in love with you. And as long as you stick to his plan, everything will be okay.  Then you look up one day and realize other women are being treated better than you.  His plan included you, but it didn’t include him being the dream man for you. 

Even some of the smartest men fail when it comes to love, because even though they try to have healthy relationships, they still think everything is about them. ~ Kissy Denise 

I once dated this guy and when I met him my life was at another turning point, doors were closing everywhere, and at the time I wasn’t deep into God as I am now. So I had no idea what was happening to me. I just knew I was in emotional pain, as I watched my life fall apart in devastation and I didn’t know what to do.  You know those periods of when everything always works out for you, you walk on water, and pull off miracles, year after year, day after day, like magic, until one day it just doesn’t work anymore….. When that door closes, signaling it’s time for you to move on to your next assignment.  Tis the life of a called soul. 

So without God being at the head of my life at that point, the answer appeared to be this man that appeared.  Really dope guy, but initially I’d ran from him for years, cause deep down I knew he wasn’t right for me. But here he is, in this dark time, standing there, appearing to be the only source of light around me.  It seems right. It’s aligned. Aligned to teach you some lessons. He’s about to destroy your life even more over time, but you don’t know that, and this is what he was called to do for you. He’s an agitator of greatness.  After him and his b.s. you’re going to wake up and realize your value.

What happens during such a relationship is that most of the time you spend time romanticizing a bad man. You see the future with him, cause he could very well be your dream man, if he wanted to. You imagine when things are great between you. You’re living the life, you’re on the beach, you’re living in the mansion, you have beautiful kids with him, money is everywhere, you’re traveling together, and life is good. You see the divine in him. But in reality he’s putting you through a bunch of stupid sh*t, making stupid decisions, not putting you first, not seeming to really give af about you.  But then there’s the good times, the gifts, the conversations, the good sex, the laughs, the adventures. He’s so smart. Smarter than the other men you’ve been with. Because of these good times you choose to ignore the bad. You hope and pray one day it will get better. I mean if he’ll just stop those bad things, he would be the perfect man for you. 

That’s the part you don’t get. He doesn’t want to be the perfect man for you. He wants you to be the perfect woman for HIM. It’s not really a two-way street. 

That man abused me, took advantage of my knowledge to further himself, tore me down, spoke bad about me, lead me down the wrong path, and totally didn’t give af about me.  He slowed down my destiny and destroyed his own.  He told me that no other man would ever put me in a Range Rover.  A Range Rover isn’t enough to keep a woman as divine as me. I need more than that. Other women were being treated better than me, and I couldn’t have that. Why should I be any less than Queen? I can’t, and I won’t.  That man is dead now. I believe I’m an earth angel and he had a beautiful opportunity to change his life with me, but he chose worldly desires.  But phuck him, this ain’t about him. 

Divine women often don’t realize she can make almost any man fall in love with her. But, do you really want to spend the next 5 years of your life being treated as less than, before he wakes up and maybe sees that you’re the Queen? No you don’t. Life isn’t forever. At some point you have to stop your self-sacrificing behavior.  You have to stop putting yourself last. You have to start asking for help and getting the things you want. 

Cause did you also notice that you’re the woman who is so mthfking great at doing everything for yourself? HELP. When people say the word help you’re not even familiar with it. You barely even know that looks like. You’re always helping your man, men, your friends, strangers, the cat, the dog and everyone else. You’ve become quite accustomed to no one being there to help you.  And of course not. You’re always willing to do things everyone else’s way, with no concerns about your own. 

Cause you know that you’ll be okay. You know you got you.  But you didn’t come into this life to just be okay. You came to live the dream. Like Katrina Ruth says, it has to be F*CK YES!  That man was never a F*CK YES Sis. You tried to turn him into one, and even then his azz was not willing to go with the plan. 

You see here’s the thing. Men have no choice but to go with our phucking plan. Otherwise they can’t keep us.   Now here’s where this gets REALLY good. The man for you already has YOUR plan encoded in him from the jump. When he shows up he’s going to be like “Baby you can have whatever you like!”  

He knows you’re one of a kind. You’re going to fall hard. You will no longer have to pretend or forcefully see the divine in him.  He’ll see the divine in you. Which allows you to continually feel safe and enjoy seeing the divine in him, soaking it up, appreciating that finally, you no longer have to pretend that you have an amazing man, the way these basic b*tches do. 

However, the only man who is going to be that for you is a god. And even when you meet a god, every god ain’t for you. All gods before you meet the one are simply preparing you to submit and come unto surrender. When you’re in full surrender to the Universe, and submitted unto God, your God King will arrive.

Have fun!