The number one reason why women have such low self-esteem is one thing. It’s the men they deal with. You are responsible for your own self-esteem, which means you are responsible to maintain an aura around you that backs up your belief system. Putting people into your vortex who don’t value you at the level you value yourself will have you going all wrong.
For example there are men who don’t open doors for a woman, won’t buy her anything, won’t express affection or emotion to her, won’t return her texts and calls, unless at least 6 hours have passed, yet upon sight every other weekend he wants sex from her. Sex that doesn’t even come with any type of heart or soul connection. Yet, such a man will tell a woman that he is the best guy in the world. When clearly anyone with eyes can see he doesn’t care about the woman. For some men, that’s all of the love they have to give. And any woman who accepts such a man is signing up for misery and mediocrity. The only way she would ever be able to get the love she needs would be to cheat on him with a better man. To which cheating is such a waste of time and makes you look cheap.
But a woman who is already in a relationship with a man who is emotionally cheap, can’t really feel any lower about herself. So cheating is no big deal to her.
Do you see how things go when you put yourself on discount, in order to deal with a man who only comes with 35% of what another man would? But he doesn’t want you comparing him to other men, because that would also be terrible of you.
It doesn’t pay to humble yourself. It doesn’t pay to think of yourself as less than. Because when you do, you almost are guaranteed to end up with a man who doesn’t value you. Most people don’t value you until you value yourself. And top notch people have to value themselves in every way, including looks. So if you take your top notch self who is worth an infinite amount of money, but for the sake of this article, lets just say you’re worth $1 Million bucks. You’re worth $1 Million, but then you decide to put yourself on discount in the name of humility, for a buster who doesn’t even know how to keep a basic woman happy, let alone a chick who is as valuable as you.
Let me tell you what he will do to you.
1. Your value to him is somewhere near the $500 mark. That’s about how much he will spend on you. He might go up to $1000 bucks but that’s pushing it.
2. He will tell you that looks aren’t important. That beautiful women are everywhere. They are a dime a dozen. That a woman has to bring more than good looks to the table. Suddenly you looking so good, becomes a bad thing. YET, it’s mostly the reason he sought out to date you. Other times he is literally telling you his value system IS NOT a beautiful woman. But humble you ignores this red flag and continues to deal with him and be treated less than average.
3. His attention will constantly be on other women. He’ll ignore your social media posts and photos, but chances are you’ll notice he’s quick to double tap on another girls post or click the LIKE button on another woman’s posts he’s never met.
4. You can’t ask him to do anything for you. Asking him for anything is too much. He barely even knows anything about you and your life. Dealing with him is so emotionally painful, that you constantly feel your trauma pain body being activated.
5. SEX – He still wants sex from you. He wants to phuck you in 69 different positions. Chances are his heart is never involved in the sex. You’ve actually never made love. He just phucks you.
6. You watch other women shine and prosper. You wonder why they are so happy and so confident. You see single women even more happier than you are. It never occurs to you that they have actual GOOD men in their lives who DO for them.
7. Now he’s taking points from you, telling you that because you have a scar, you’re “getting old, you’re this and that, and because of it, your value is going down.” The whole time he’s trying to manipulate you and use scare tactics to get you to be with him. Don’t be surprised if he posts old lady with a cat memes to hammer the message in. Once again, LOVE is not his M.O. Yet he wants you to love him.
These are the things that happen to you when you’re too afraid to let go. When you’re too afraid to hurt someone’s feelings, who can care less if they hurt your feelings. When you put yourself on discount, you get treated like a discount b*tch. Like a random stray dog.
Did you notice that Bentley never goes on sale? Did you notice that people respect a Bentley when it pulls up?
You want to know what people like? They like the successful man. They like the woman who has followers. They like the woman who is loved. They like the woman who is successful. They like the woman who loves herself. But only so few men can afford to get access to such a woman. So what do the rest of the guys want?
They want you to humble yourself and come down to their level so they can destroy you with their mediocrity.
So here is the thing Sis. You’d better create your position of value and maintain it. Cause guess what? A phuck boys highest honor is the fact that an Instagram model once paid him some ATTENTION.
He values the ATTENTION he got from her, even if it never came with nothing more than a hug, maybe a peck kiss and a few smiles. Why does he value her? Because she valued herself enough to keep it moving on him, and not allow him to play her out or use her body up for peasant nuggets. She is playing for GOLD, while you were playing for LOVE. Therefore she removed him from her vortex cause he couldn’t afford the cost to be the boss. She HAPPILY went on to the next man who could afford the cost. And because she stood her value ground with sweet words, he never even knew what hit him. He thinks he had a choice the whole time. But there wasn’t a choice. There was “Dude. You ain’t all that. This ain’t a I’m just going to love you for you thing. Value me at MY level, and provide and take care of me or get gone.” She had no guilt at all holding her value. He would choose not to provide for her and move on to an easier target.
Then what happens? Then when he gets his money up and he’s tired of dogging out the easy, low-value target, he backtracks and goes out to get a new instagram model whom he can now easily afford, cause he no longer has to worry about his money flow.
Then what happens to the discount hoe? Now she’s hurt, heartbroken and devastated over man who never invested in her in the first place. This whole thing about dating is that most men are average AF. Even when they get a little money they don’t upgrade their dating habits. He believes that he can now get women simply because he’s successful and has money. Which is true. Which is also how many men get screwed over cause they don’t even know when a woman loves him. Mostly because a woman was created to BE loved. So men look for a woman he can pour love into. But most men look for the least inexpensive, but most attractive woman, and beat down her self-esteem till she’s kindly listening to everything he says, doesn’t feel too highly about herself and has no thoughts of her own.
So, if you’re not a Queen already IN YOUR EYES, before you meet these men, chances are you’ll never be one. Most men simply aren’t going to find you on the ground and lift you up. It’s the perfect opportunity for any possibly smart man. But like I said, they want women who are doing well in life. They want women who are doing better than them. And if you get yourself caught up in these kind of men, don’t expect to walk around feeling super confident. You may as well toss you and your discounted azz ego in the trash.
You have not met the man of your dreams, until you meet a man who is in your life to serve you at your highest good and wants to give you EVERYTHING, and you don’t have to beg him for anything. Period.
If a man is in love with you, of course he’s going to do everything in his power to make you happy. The fact that you believe you’re supposed to be in a relationship and make yourself happy, is where you go left. Relationships are to add to your happiness. Relationships give you more happiness. The insanity of it all, is believing they don’t.
Your spirit and soul is made in the image of God. Of course you’re supposed to be treated like royalty. If you don’t add tax to these dudes, they simply won’t respect you.
So if a man wants you, you MUST ask him what he has to offer you. Then you may as well DOUBLE his offer. If he is willing to double down, chances are you’ve met your LOVE match. A man is only going to love a woman he invests in. You get your match when you hold to your standards and expectations. Being humble and less arrogant, actually DOESN’T land you your dream man. But being sweet and making sure a man RISES to meet your standards, values you at not a penny less, and rolls out the red carpet for you, will land you your dream man. This is what I tell my clients, and they ultimately end up meeting men who give their ALL. They never even have to ask him to double down. He comes willing, able and simply DOES.
I would suggest everyone head on on over to Amazon to purchase my new book. You Can’t Force A Man To Value You – Becoming a High Value Woman & Attracting The Man Of Your Dreams.