I was reading this article on MadameNoire today about Cassie.
“Cassie is living right now, if you’re not a hater, you can shake your head in amazement and excitement for her. The singer and model, who just turned 33 yesterday and is pregnant with her first child with beau Alex Fine, shared video of him proposing to her on August 24. Alex, who is a trainer, professional bull rider and loves riding horses, got help from Compton Cowboys to put on something of a country Western proposal.
“This moment will always be so special to me,” he wrote on Instagram. “I get to marry my best friend in the whole world. How am I so lucky!”
Cassie shared the good news with the caption, “My favorite day ever! #MrsFine.” ht
I read the article and I wondered some things to myself. I even asked myself if I considered this a “glow up.” I thought about how it had only been a year and she’s already pregnant by a new man. Meanwhile I was so hurt after my last breakup that it took me a year just to let a man take me out on a date. I truly did a lot of healing on myself. I saw where I went wrong. That’s not to say that anyone should follow my same path or share the same experiences.
So I wondered if this was a fast move by Cassie to try to recover from Diddy and show him that someone else would not only love her, appreciate her, treat her like a Queen and give her a baby and a ring. I’m not here to judge, but it feels to me like more of a “Take that Diddy!”
Twitter is lit with the YESes stating that Cassie found the man she was supposed to be with. While it may seem that way, not is Twitter mostly sleep af, with no understanding of reality, I also think back to Evelyn Lozada who quickly popped up pregnant on a beach after breaking up with Ocho. She quickly married a baseball star. THAT was definitely a level up. Yet that relationship eventually ended too. So I know how women think and how they move. Sometimes after a breakup they barely give themselves a chance to figure out what it is they truly want; as they are too busy trying to prove to the last man how much of a catch she is and what he lost out on.
By giving myself that space and time to heal, I have ultimately learned that what I truly like is a brilliant man. Just that tidbit of information has changed my life and gave me a great deal of understanding about myself.
Anyway, Cassie recovered her life after spending a decade letting Diddy play her like a fiddle without marrying her.
If a man hasn’t proposed to you by the 2-year-mark, his loyalty towards you is questionable. Many women don’t want to accept this, but it’s the truth. Men always know what they want. They will definitely bide time with you as they figure it out.
This is also the thing that women have to realize. There is always a man out there willing to give you your dream on a platter. When you settle for less than your soul desires it won’t work out. Money doesn’t change that.
Cassie has always been a Queen, but Diddy treated her like a sh*tty sidechick. She didn’t leave. She waited until Diddy was done with her. Lucky she’s only 33 so she had plenty of time to recover.
Don’t let these men talk you up out of your hopes and dreams. You deserve to have it all. I know men often sit you down and tell you that they are not going to give you A,B,C,D & E and it confuses you cause you really like him, and you want him to be your dream man. But he has his own plans. That plan doesn’t include being the dream man for you. Settling and doing it his way may work and it may not work. The question is, Will You Be Happy? Or will you have to yearn for another man to come in and give you the things your man won’t?
Women often sacrifice so much for the sake of a relationship. Then you look up at Steve Harvey’s wife and that woman is put on a pedestal. Steve’s life has rapidly changed since then. The one deep lesson I’ve learned about love is that women need a man who wants to give her the world. What good man wants his wife to be the woman who gets half of him, while her girlfriends can brag about how good their man is? Highly successful, happy men, understand how important their wife is.
You want the man who goes hard for you. You don’t ever want to be the woman looking at other women wondering why she’s being treated like a Queen and you’re not. THAT’S the man reason many women lack confidence. You’ve never had a man pour immense love into and you also don’t know how to pour that love into yourself. I know these things cause I pour a lot of love into people and my clients and heal them from a lifetime of not seeing themselves.