I don’t have time to be half-way loved or part-time loved

I don’t have time to be half-way loved or part-time loved

This thing going around the planet, has really made me look at the men who pursue me and their true intentions.  I realized that I have time for some good love. I have lots of time available for sacred love. 

I also noticed that you beautiful, brilliant, sophisticated, empowered, divine, magical, spiritual women full of love, laughs and purpose, will be surrounded by an army of men in pursuit of you, if you let them in. 

If you’re not letting more than 1-1 at a time in to get to know you, you’re limiting your dating choices to whatever comes at you, instead of holding space until you get what you want. 

Rule #2 is that men tend to bore of women whom they don’t have to compete for. He finds not much value in a chill woman.

Relax, he can take it. 

A beta man may be outright devastated if he knows you went out on a date with another man, and he’ll hold that in his heart.  But have no doubts, that man is full of mediocrity, and fear of honoring his greatnesss. (Yes girl, a whole extra “S”)  Because a true King, has belief in himself to beat out all others. 

A King be like “Girl, you know you’re going to be my wife.”  But so many clowns have said it that it probably doesn’t mean much to you.  But that’s not the way you act. That’s why you need to have boundaries, and not strictly operate from your heart.

Attracted people with boundaries will teach you some valuable lessons. 

One guy told a woman that he was done with her since she wouldn’t marry him. He moved on to a basic chick, and seems to be at least finding some temporary form of happiness.  She always knew he would be happy with less than, and never actually saw her deepest value. Love was simply not apart of him. For him a relationship is LOGIC and in his eyes, if he gives a woman $30,000, that means he should be able to buy her heart.  He wanted a boss chick without understanding our mind or heart.  On top of that he had no value for my beauty. My oh my, how in the past, you thought that was quite alright since you know they say “Beauty fades.”  You would never discount yourself like that again. It’s all about the facts of NOW. 

Another guy said that he wasn’t accepting A. B. and C. from her. and that if she wanted to be with him, she would have to do things another way. 

This freed the woman of her people pleasing syndrome and truly reiterated the understanding and depth of how men don’t value being loved by a woman.  Instead they care about who they love, and the way to a man’s heart is completely opposite of the way most women think it is.

Loving him is not the key to his heart.  Ask most men about his last relationship and he will say that she did A.B.C. & D, which to any woman you will see instantly how she wasn’t in love with him.  But his belief system will say that she did indeed love him, because she never said a negative word to him.  She just showed up with the ACTION of cheating on him, and came back with kind words about that too.  Therefore he still felt SAFE with her. That safety allowed him to make excuses for him and be blinded to the fact that the problem was that she didn’t love him. Which is also a reflection of his own lack of self-love.  

You can always see how much someone loves themself, off of their appearance alone. Vanity usually isn’t apart of their routine. They view vanity as a negative thing, and let themselves go. Or they are in pain, so they let themselves go. They no longer feel good enough or worthy of looking good.  Their subconscious negative beliefs and their pain slowly takes over them.  But because the are so busy focused on making money, they never notice. 

Other men, a woman can go clean off on him, use him up, and still, that vision of her being the perfect woman remains in his mind. He’ll chase that image although he is clearly not being loved. 

For these experiences to happen and for a woman to learn the deeper lessons, she has to put away the ego that has kept her experiencing the same patterns.

ego trash

Your ego can often tell you to drop something and let it go. But instead you decided “Hey. I am not really interested in dating right now. So let’s just watch them and see how they operate.” (The decisions you make.)

People pleasers have a hard time telling someone conditions and sticking by them. People pleasers have empathy for anyone who truly loves them, and will look over their faults. People pleasers make excuses for others, and find themselves in unhealthy, toxic, relationships.  Because you think with your heart too much, instead of facing and addressing what’s in front of you. 

Later you’ll be thankful that you didn’t commit or surrender to either of those men, because at times, dealing with them, made you feel less than love. 

Now you see how those experiments were more of you self-sacrificing yourself. Sometimes its only through painful or mirrored experiences that we can see the true roots of your own self-sacrifice.  Only then can you clearly see how you were always in control of it all. 

You must live in your own truths.  I enjoy hanging out with people who vibrate on the frequency of divine love. That is my truth that I  accept and am okay with. Low energy is draining. High energy feels so right, so luscious and so good.   High energy be like “WoW. Is it really this good?”

I totally appreciate a man who has a taste for passion and love.   It’s a pleasure to be around a man who isn’t into being mediocre in any department.

You would love a man who won’t accept less than a loving experience with a divine, sacred, spiritual woman. 

You ever notice your spirit feels so free when you stop talking to men who aren’t crazy about you?  You ever notice how heavy you feel when you’re dealing with a man who obviously isn’t feeling you. Which is why he ignores you? But you thought it was something he did just in the beginning, and he’s running with it.

If you let go of trying to control, you’ll feel whole again.

My normal, warm, kind-hearted, loving, magnetic, soul filled self, loves to  be free to be divine love.  How does your soul feel?

My natural high came back. I felt joy, fresh air and life again. I began to play to the beat of life again. 

Operating in a space of pure love is everything in this world. For the purposed are called to stay vibe high.

High vibe coaches get grounded in before client calls.

I definitely receive divine downloads for my clients, because I’ve done the work. 

It was selfish you to allow myself to be part-time loved by anyone. It is selfish of you to deal with men who don’t show up properly. It is selfish of you and sacrificial of you to sit there and watch their behaviors, instead of admitting the FACTS.

You can always choose to learn from the WISDOM of others.  But so many people love to say “What works for one person, isn’t good for the next.” So instead of taking wisdom and applying it, some of us chose to learn the hard way. The way of pain.  Wisdom would’ve been so much easier.

Like the wisdom to not have sex on the first night or the first week, or the first date.  So many women would choose to say that doesn’t apply to them, and learn the hard way.  It may just work for 1/50.  But why take that chance?

You must know your type and who is for you.  Love is not a game to divine souls. You’re not like other people. Marriage isn’t just a business deal to you.  You want your love to last. You want both people in the relationship to be happy. You’re not interested in controlling anyone, playing games or having ulterior motives. Yet you try so hard to not be separate from them.  Which is why in the past, you’ve wasted time in the wrong relationships.. It came from failing to accept yourself and your deepest desires.  It came from failing to understand that what you seek is seeking you. 

Average people don’t deserve to mate with those who are called for divine love. Nor are they meant to. It’s meant for you to find your sacred soulmate. 

So now you know you don’t have time for part time love, toxic love, half-way love or any love that’s not following up with actions in congruence with it. 

Many have told you that they love you.  But you’ve never felt an ounce of love coming from either of them.  Their actions didn’t match up. But in the back of your mind you heard society and your exes telling you that you didn’t know what love is, because they believed that you should’ve been accepting of their mediocre, toxic forms of love. 

Meanwhile, your version of love is innocent and pure. Pure, yet you took with you defense mechanisms from dealing with toxic men.

Like how many women go off on a man, instead of just closing the door on him and leaving him alone.  The most loving thing you can do for a man is to close the door on him when he’s not showing up.  Going off on him, and walking with him through it, because you love him and believe in him, won’t be seen as  love by him.  

Like I said, the ex who cheated on your ex, and hopped in the next man’s bed, but said sweet words to him, is LOVE, to him.

Why do you keep letting meant how are not your type creep into your space and be so unromantic. How many romantic dates did he take you on?  How many holiday gifts did you get? Did he attempt to charm you at all? Nope… Men only do that for dream women.

It’s the little things.  Though they can and do,  do other MAJOR things… this  is about your accepting your DEEPER desires.)

It sucks to be with such an unromantic man. Any woman with them needs a man on the side, which is what most unromantic men experience. Women who cheated on them and ran into the arms of other men.  They only covered one area of a woman.

Those men usually blame the women with no understanding that it was all HIM. 

A man must take care of his woman in 5 different categories, not just one. A woman is a HUGE investment.  Without nurturing her in those 5 categories, he won’t reap the full abundance of his investment. 

In fact, men greatly benefit from tapping into a Goddess. Especially when they see the depth of her light and fully invest in her, WITH LOVE. Such men will  reap even greater benefits of abundance. 

And when I say that, both men reaped in HUGE benefits. It just could’ve been better. 

When you part-time a woman, you cut yourself off from the rest of her.  You don’t have time to be half-way loved or part-time loved, so make sure that you are giving your all too. 

The love you seek from others, is the love you need to give yourself. 

Loving yourself for some means not allowing anyone to take you off the frequency of divine love. 

When you allow people to play you short, that’s how you part time yourself. People are simply reflecting that back to you. 

The man for you, knows he wants to be with you by the 6 month mark and takes action to solidify the relationship. They each took action, and would’ve solidified had a played my part. 

The ones who move slow, simply use women up, and will tell you that they are just chilling. They believe themselves to be good men because they are honest.  But everyone knows even if a woman agrees to give her body up in exchange for nothing, that she will still crave that man and want to be with him. If a man isn’t financially covering a woman, he’s using her body up. That’s hard for many to take. However, it is the truth.  I covered this in “You Can’t Force A Man To Value You.” 

Men who don’t know what they want, damage women.  Women who won’t admit what they want, and keep boundaries that only allow in men who are with it, damage themselves. 

There’s a whole world of madness going on because people are focused on money and everything other than love. 

Refuse to be apart of that world. In your world you get money, love, success, joy, freedom and everything good that life has to offer. 

Why CHOOSE to settle for less?

In addition, are you the type to cut people off. Here is a meme for you. 

when nails grow

Communication is everything! 

READY FOR DIVINE LOVE?

50/50 Men Are Toxic & Disappointing

50/50 Men Are Toxic & Disappointing

I don’t actually call anyone TOXIC in my life.  I have a deep understanding that what you see in others tends to be a reflection of something you see in yourself.

So, here is THE TRUTH:

self accountability in relationships

You’re not disappointed in him. You’re disappointed in yourself, because you keep believing in him, while he disappoints you time and time again.

That man has never showed up for you Sis. All he ever did was do 1 THING that got you to like him. He never went past that mark. He’s been dangling a carrot in your face, leading you on and you’ve been accepting it. 

Then each time you know you need to cut him off, you complain, and he tells you not to complain about him.  You can’t get through to him, but he says it’s all you, and IT IS. 

So you breathe, reset, and put on your positive mindset again…. and once again, focus on the good in him, just to be disappointed again; while he tells you how you’re not good enough, and that YOU need to be a better woman. 

He tells you that you need to work harder. He pushes the slave ship….  Not to mention there is WAY more of you, standing in line, waiting to be his  peace; telling him how good of a man he is, although he’s actually not being a good MAN to anyone.

There’s lots of  PICK ME and EFFORT girls like you in the world, who keep 50/50 men sitting on a pedestal, using up women, until his dream woman finally shows up.



The insanity of it all, of how YOU unconsciously have tried to get this man to value you. 

You Can’t Force A Man To Value You is deeper than just a book title.  Which is why you have to read the book. 

So many women think that by being patient, being a good woman, being kind, saying kind words, buying gifts, cooking, doing laundry, keeping the house clean, encouraging a man, and speaking life into him, will someday magically cause a man to wake up and value her. 

It truly doesn’t go like that.  A man simply values what he values. He values what he loves. 

When a man first approaches you, he values you.  That value is going to increase or decrease, depending on how you ALLOW him to treat you and how much YOU VALUE YOURSELF. 

Have sex with a man who is not paying your bills, and Sis you are dooming yourself, 97% of the time.  You have just set up the framework for the relationship to be a waste of BOTH of your time.  Yes, he is going to pressure you into sex. That doesn’t mean you should give it to him. 

Now he’s like “What else do you have to offer? You don’t do anything for me. Other women love having sex with me too.”

He now takes a lot of pride in draining ALL OF YOU, for your energy, and telling his friends how ALL OF YOU suck, and how NONE OF YOU are good enough. NONE of his friends are going to direct traffic back to him, to help him see his part in the equation. 

And at the end of it all, you know what he’s going to tell you. 

The infamous words of the traumatized, wounded, immature man:  “You don’t even know me. I don’t owe you anything.” 

And we can blame men all day for this. But Sis, YOU are the one to blame. 

LISTEN BELOW TO THIS PODCAST that real estate and investment mogul, Robert Duvale Yancy & I did, for some reality shattering truths about relationships. 

This is Part 1 of a 5 part Series called “You Can’t Force A Man To Value You.

Here is part 1 : 50/50 Men Are Toxic 

I am so excited about this series that breaks down your belief system. If you’re on your laptop, please leave some comments on Youtube. We need positive energy to keep this going.  This is going to get better and better. 

What looks like Self-Sabotage in relationships, is often Self-Sacrifice

What looks like Self-Sabotage in relationships, is often Self-Sacrifice

Once you start working on yourself. You work on yourself even when you’re unaware that you’re working yourself. Your soul is working on you, even in your sleep.  You’ll wake up with huge shifts, unexpectedly. 

Some days I wake up and I can clearly see a shift occurring.  One day I woke up and noticed that suddenly I was letting go of something. I was really calm about it, and accepted it. 

The next day, I woke up feeling a little triggered over it.  After sitting with the feeling for an hour and allowing myself to explore it, accept it, and feel it out,  I realized that I had just discovered a pattern.

The pattern of getting upset with people when I decided to no longer love them. 

Why would I get upset with such freedom and relief from pain?

Because I had self-sacrificed myself and continued in a relationship that I knew was doomed, in the name of hope and working it out. I continued on in the pain of not getting what I wanted out of a relationships. Positive thinking gone wrong. Spiritually seeing people as their highself self doesn’t always change things. 

Then when I finally got tired of not getting what I wanted, I had the audacity to be upset with them for MAKING me fall out of love with them. Cray! Like I was real life pissed off at my ex boyfriends for MAKING me fall out of love with them.

I placed all of the blame on THEM, instead of myself.  How despicable. Going into your patterns and darkness can be so UGH.  But without doing the work, who knows if the pattern would’ve ever stopped. Probably not. 

It’s really important that you face yourself and start dealing with your feelings.  I used to have a habit of not dealing with my feelings, because my feelings never mattered to the people that I was in relationships with.  Men didn’t care if I cried. They didn’t care how much they hurt me. They didn’t even care if they broke my heart. I truly got used to kicking my emotions to the side and believing that they did not serve me. 

However love serves me, so I would always return to it, like a pet owner who nurses a sick snake back to health, and then gets surprised that the healed snake now struck out at him and bit him. 

I actually allowed people to tell me that their mediocre love should be accepted by me. I self-sacrificed my own happiness in order to make them happy.  I put on rosey colored glasses and telling myself that they weren’t so bad, and that maybe I needed to be a better person.  I kept looking for what was wrong with me, instead of accepting that NO, they were not good enough for me and would probably never be.  They’d definitely never be if I accepted them the way they were. Which I partially did, or screamed about it.  Which people also don’t like when you scream at them. But I screamed instead of immediately dumping them, because I cared about them. 

But what about me? More self-sacrifice.  A man not completely showing up for me would even say it was self-sabotage because I was pushing him away.  Of course he thinks his not showing all the way up should be okay with me, because HE had better things to do.

I learned so much by actually not attempting to date, and to literally just allow people to BE around me, and see how that played out. 

During that time, the pain kept coming. The pain will keep going and going, until you stop, the pattern. 

In response to the pain, we often change ourselves into new people. We stop doing the nice things we once did. We try to conform to a better strategy that is said to work.  We forget to make the world conform to us. 

One thing that’s important for Unicorns to know is that you will always attract love. You are magical. You truly love other humans.  But the humans are playing a completely different game from you. You’re not even in the game.  You’re just there being love. But when they see you, they can’t SEE you, so they start up with their same strategy they’ve been using, or the new one they want to use.  Either way it doesn’t work for you. Nothing works for you accept divine love. 

What is happening here is that although you can have a great amount of love for yourself, and that would be quite enough for most humans, but you have to love yourself even more. 

You have to stop caring about others more than you care about yourself. You have to stop putting others first.  In your mind you are putting love first, which is good. But your definition of love is different from others. When the match is correct you share the same concept of love.

Getting with someone who doesn’t share that same concept is self-sabotage. Your empathic traits keeps you always focused on the other person understanding where they are coming from.  That empathy and understanding makes you forget about yourself. You start trying to accept them, but they never accept you for you, because you are not being you. 

Therefore the way they treat you is a reflection of you.  THAT is why you are always the common denominator. 

You’ll always attract love, but you are judged based upon the character of people you allow into YOUR life and HOW they treat you. 

Meghan Markle is admired because she married a Prince who treats her like a Queen and puts her first.

Ciara is admired because she has a man who treats her like a Queen. She wasn’t admired when she was with Future who dogged her out. 50 Cent dogged her out too. So did Bow Wow. Each wanted multiple women. Russel wanted a Queen to honor.  Ciara is still the same woman, but her reputation changed based upon the men she dated. 

People have to come to you with a desire to be one with you, a desire to pour love into you, and a desire to do right by you. 

Most of society offers mediocre, basic and scrappy love. You must get comfortable with the fact that those kinds are not your true. Everything is in abundance in life, but some things are so good, that they are 1 in a million.  Have you even met a million people? Did you give yourself time to find the one? Or did you rush and take whatever, thinking you could fix them and get them to see things your way?

The things we do to ourselves….  Now you can take self-accountability for other areas in your life, where you are placing the blame outside of yourself.  But don’t be too hard on yourself. Sometimes God is in control and sh*t happens, because that’s the way this goes. You only have so much control over your life. Control is an illusion.  Surrender is nothing more than understanding that this all goes God’s way, not your way, and accepting that.