Communication is the most important part of maintaining a relationship. When the individuals inside the relationship fail to communicate their wants, desires, and needs properly, on top of being their authentic selves, the relationship is bound to fail.
On the reality tv show Love & Marriage: Huntsville Martell Holt’s actions made him out to be the villain in many viewers’ eyes.
Martell Holt said his marriage to Melody Holt didn’t work out because he wasn’t getting all he needed in their bedroom. Plus, the “Love & Marriage: Hunstville” star feels as if marriages also don’t work out because women can be too argumentative.
Before Destiny Payton-Williams confirmed her divorce from La’Berrick Williams, Martell told her that her marriage would eventually be tested because he felt she had too much mouth. Fans of the show accused Martell of being misogynistic, but Martell stood firm on Instagram and said what he stated is backed up by divorce statistics.
Melody said that the reason for the divorce was not only cheating, but also years into the marriage she noticed that Martell, 40, had not matured.
Martell a successful custom home builder turned reality TV star’s 7-year affair led to the demise of his marriage to Melody Shari. Now, Martell says his mistress didn’t provide half of what he received from his wife.
He regrets his affair, explaining Melody gave him the majority of what he needed/wanted but he desired more.
Martell alleges that he complained to Melody about her not giving him enough attention, focusing too much on work, not cooking enough, and not satisfying him sexually as often as he preferred. As a result, he sought what he says he was lacking in his marriage from another woman.
He eventually entered into a seven-year relationship with Arionne Curry, and the two have a son conceived while he was still married to Melody.
In fact, Curry’s son and Martell and Melody’s youngest daughter aren’t even a year apart.
In retrospect, Martell says he wouldn’t have made the same decision. He also explained that in the grand scheme of things, Melody was giving him more of what he yearned for.
“I think that was very foolish of me to do such a thing. But at that time, I wasn’t thinking like, oh my wife she’s giving me 85 percent and she’s giving me 15 or whatever,” he said.
He continued, adding that his decision to cheat was immature at best. Looking back, he wishes he would have handled things differently.
“I wasn’t thinking like that. If I would have thought like that, I don’t want that d*mn 15 percent,” he said. “I’ma stick in this house and sit my a*s down somewhere. But that wasn’t the case. I think that I just wasn’t thinking.”
Earlier in the interview Martell was asked about his experience with rejection and the way he handled it. To which Martell responded that his ex wife used to reject him, and he responded by cheating.
Holt says he felt like he had no choice but to. He had the discussion with his wife about what she wasn’t doing, like “she wasn’t cooking and I couldn’t have sex whenever I wanted it, so that really pushed me out the door. But I had to ask myself the reason why she was rejecting me.”
Before he could finish the full statement as to HIS PART and WHY his wife was rejecting him, the host interrupted him to ask how long was it between deciding to cheat and actually doing it.
Holt says the night before he met his new girlfriend, he and Melody got into it, where she told him to go get a girlfriend.
Holt: She said “Go out there and find you a girlfriend. That got into my spirit apparently, cause that night I met the girl and I told her “I want you to be my girlfriend.”
He loved that his girlfriend provided him with comfort, listened to him and respected him as a man, catered to him and stroked his ego. Holt says he needed those things.
In the beginning he felt getting but as time progressed he felt less guilty and it became the norm.
Martell said that in his marriage his wife didn’t complain about much, but he was the one complaining. Therefore he was able to have a 7-year-long affair with another woman before the marriage was dissolved.
Martell says he communicated but his wife later said “You should’ve grabbed me, and sat me down and told me that if you don’t take care of me, that I’m going to go out and cheat on you.”
Martell then explains that it was her fault for not communicating and that he was tired of having to go out with the kids to get food, because she wasn’t feeding him.
Watch the insightful video clip below:
Always give 100% in your relationship. If you can’t do that, don’t be in it.
To give 100% means:
1. Only get in a relationship with someone you have the deepest love for.
2. Ground yourself in that love and speak from that place
3. Ground yourself in SELF-LOVE
4. Be authentic about what you want. A person can not serve the needs you hide from them
5. Pay attention to your partner and know what they need before they do.
Ultimately the difference between a woman and a man is a woman will stick around to not get her needs met. But most men are going to go find SOMEONE to meet their needs. Even if that means stepping outside of the relationship.
While women often place their BUSINESS SUCCESS first in a relationship, the average man cares more about sex and getting his ego stroked. He will literally tear his entire empire down just to be sexually pleased by a woman with half the brain. For most men it’s all about the femininity and pleasure, not the knowledge in a woman’s brain.